On the second day, I ate and drank my fill, contentedly sitting in the prisoner’s cart with Xiao Huang to head toward the capital. Xiao Huang stroked the thin white cotton cloth wrapped on top of my head, blinking his big, watery eyes.

“Xiao Yi, yesterday the white cloth I saw covering your head was still old and dirty, in the course of one night, how did it become new?”

Can I say that this thin white cotton cloth was torn from Yan Ping‘s inner garment?

If Xiao Huang hears this, he would be scared to the point where his eyeballs would drop out, right?

Since long before, Yan Ping has hated me to the bone. I don't even understand. I only just told him that I am a female, but unexpectedly, I was able to provoke the protective feelings he had towards the fairer sex, causing him to tear his own inner garments for me to wrap my wound.

I touched my face, my skin was thick and rough and I was definitely not beautiful. When he used his beauty to lure me, I was completely attracted to him. If it were back the— How great would it have been if it were back then?

That year, I hated that I couldn’t shatter my flesh and dissolve my bones for him.

It’s a pity that last night, when he bound my head wound for me, a single line was spat out.

“Based on your skills, you should have been able to avoid it, so why didn’t you avoid it?”

That pair of gentle eyes steadily watched me. After so many years, I still cannot feel his thoughts, and nowadays, I am disinclined to waste my consideration. Immediately, I laughed.

“I’m a man!”

He knocked me once on the head. A stream of blood immediately flowed out, but I was completely senseless to it and was still smiling brilliantly. His face paled, and he hastily fished out blood-staunching medicine from his bosom. He forcefully poured it onto my head while scolding me.

“Don’t you know how to feel pain? Why didn't you try to dodge?”

Now, I am penniless and alone. Without love and without hate. Even without worries. I no longer fear if  he was scheming something. I nonchalantly and happily bit into the meat pancake he had brought over.

“It doesn’t hurt. I haven’t been able to feel pain for a long time now.”

He became furious.

“An Yi, don’t play the fool in front of me! What temper do you have? Do you think I don’t know?!”

I continued chewing my meat pancake, blankly thinking, What kind of temper do I have?

The An Yi of the past swore to Yan Ping but that was only the past.

The past has long ago become floating dust!

Suddenly I felt a prick in my body, but it didn't really hurt. I continued to eat my meat pie, hoping to fill my stomach first, but he got so angry that he snatched my meat pie and threw it on the ground.


"Eat, eat, eat, all you know is to eat! This is the most painful acupuncture point on the human body, and you actually endured it?"

I regretfully picked up that half of a meat pancake, blew off the dust on top, and continued to stuff it into my mouth, really not understanding why the once gentle person was now irritable to this degree.

Not wanting to anger him anymore, in the end, I told him the truth.

“I couldn't feel pain three years ago. I tried it, whether it was pricking with a needle or stabbing with a knife, I couldn't feel any pain.”

The surprise in his eyes became stronger, along with what appeared to be sorrow, as though it were he who had lost his sense of pain. If I didn’t know that he has always extremely disliked me, without even a thread of romantic feelings towards me, I’m afraid I would be under the impression that his heart was aching for me.

I patted his shoulder with my oily hands, conceitedly smiling.

“Actually, this is also nothing. Without pain, that year, in the battle between the great Chen and the great Qi, I was able to charge ahead without fearing death.  In any case, there was no longer any pain. Even if I were to die, it would be nothing more than to lose consciousness.”

His face suddenly became deathly pale, and he remained silent for a long while. It’s not clear whether he was recalling that battle or recalling the defeat of our country, the crumbling of city walls.

I still had meat pancakes, eating them merrily while sighing.

“If it is possible to have meat pancakes along the way tomorrow so that I don’t starve while riding the prisoner’s cart, then this life will be comparable to that of the immortals, right?”

A pool of water suddenly welled up in his eyes, unexpectedly looking as though they were about to spill forth tears.

I couldn’t help but burst into laughter, pointing at him incredulously.

“General Yan, you can’t be shedding these few sympathizing teardrops just because I’m fated to be beheaded in the city, right? Or is it that losing me, this kind of admirer, has caused you so much distress that you would drop these few tears?”

He embarrassedly turned his head away.

“Hey, I was wrong, isn't it okay? As the saying goes, if I fall, there are thousands more. The eyes of the girls in the imperial capital are especially bright. General Yan is so young and heroic, and his admirers are bound to come one after another. General, there is no need to be sentimental, absolutely not!!”


He ran away amid my loud laughter.

So since then, for the entire journey, besides the soldiers who punctually served up meat pancakes, I never saw Yan Ping approach the prisoner’s cart again.

Xiao Huang sat across, anxiously staring at me.

“Xiao Yi, why won’t brother Yan Ping come see us?”

How would I know his thoughts?

But I still expertly tricked Xiao Huang. Feigning a sad expression.

“Probably because he dislikes me.”

Xiao Huang slammed the shackles on his body on the prison cart a few times, and seeing that the escorting soldiers were a few steps away and didn't pay attention to the movement here, he approached carefully.

“Xiao Yi, aren’t you always the most resourceful? It would be best to think of a way for us to escape, right? I heard that Great Qi‘s emperor, Feng Zhao Wen, can give orders for someone to be beheaded without even blinking.”

I leaned back. My neck was unfortunately restrained by a wooden yoke and was rather uncomfortable. Left with no options, I breathed a long sigh and gave him a glance.

“Bringing you along, can I escape?”

Xiao Huang‘s face suddenly wrinkled up like a steamed bun. Remaining silent for a long while, he hung his head and thought. Eventually, he scooted over again and whispered in a low voice.

“Didn’t the regent give you an army seal to keep? Preserving our lives is the most important. Don’t tell me you want to keep it and give it to Feng Zhao Wen.”

Shocked, I sized him up. Was this still the same foolish Xiao Huang?

His eyes flashed for a bit, and he again courageously turned his head to look at me straight on.

“Xiao Yi, I have followed you for three years, and never once have I seen that army seal. No matter what, you and I have always been tied up by the same rope. Why not take out that army seal and help me accomplish big things? In the future, you will be considered an outstanding founding minister.”

Actually, what business of mine is this outstanding founding minister rubbish?

My father said he saw my ineptness at literature, incompetence at martial arts, and useless appearance and could only hope that I would live a life of ease and comfort in these chaotic times. As for great accomplishments or bringing honor to the family, in those days, he didn’t even know where my paternal grandfather was buried, so I could just completely forget about that part.

Besides worrying about having enough food and warm clothes for myself, I only worry about this child in front of me. I hinted for him to come closer with my eyes, then stuck my forehead onto his forehead.

“Sure enough, staying in the prison cell for too long can easily muddle a person. Oh, Xiao Huang, who taught you these lines?”

His forehead was a little cold. Sticking to it, I felt half my heart chill. If I had known earlier that he followed me and suffered for an army seal that I’d never even heard about before, I shouldn’t have put so much effort into doing field labor so that I could raise him. I should have just let him starve until he was half dead.

His eyes, clear like water, held a reflection of me with hair as tangled as sogon grass and a withered complexion. I smirked, and immediately, that lowly person within his eyes became ugly enough to scare a small child into crying.

“Xiao Yi, you don’t need to be stubborn! If we keep going like this, we will definitely have no chance of survival. If you don’t take it out now, don’t tell me you are going to wait until later, when we’re being decapitated, to take it out.”

I don’t know why I found it so difficult to stop laughing.

“You, this foolish child! At that time, after my father passed, you should have asked me right away. If it had been on me, I would have certainly given it to you. It’s not even an object I can’t live without. It must have been so exhausting for you these three years, following me and suffering!”

He blankly stared at me, the expression on his face a little hesitant. Then the sound of his voice turned cold.

“You’d truly rather die than be willing to take out the army seal?”

I looked at him, vexed. How can I make him believe me?

I hadn’t yet thought of an answer when the sound of horse hooves entered my ear. In the blink of an eye, more than ten black-clothed people mounted on horses and grasping swords rushed over. The expression on Xiao Huang‘s face relaxed. According to my speculations, this group of people should be the great Chen emperor's protection faction. I had originally thought that they had been wiped out by Feng Zhao Wen since early on. As it turns out, they had actually been protecting Xiao Huang in secret.

These few black-clothed people’s skills weren’t feeble. Very quickly, they were engaged in combat with the escort soldiers in one spot. Among them, a black-clothed person with an extremely tall and sturdy figure roared.

“Save his majesty! Quickly, save his majesty!”

I cheerfully cupped my fist towards Xiao Huang.

“Xiao Huang, you and I shall part ways today. From now on, this servant will not have to worry about Your Majesty’s food and clothes. At last, I am relieved of a heavy burden! Your majesty, please continue taking good care of yourself!”

He had been watching the battle with a somewhat nervous appearance.  Hearing what I said, he was stunned.

“Xiao Yi, don’t tell me you’re not leaving with me?!”

I smilingly shook my head, raising it to look at the high skies and broad clouds. My expression couldn’t help but be sorrowful.

“That path that you have picked is too exhausting. I just want to be well-clothed and fed, happy and comfortable, and live out the rest of my life in a place with springs and trees. Alas, it is just a dream in the end. It’s fine, though. Even though I won’t go to a place of springs and trees, I can still go down to Yellow Springs. Anyhow, it’s still a place where I can avoid work.”

All around the prisoner’s cart, two groups of men and horses were fighting intoxicatedly. He silently stared at me, probably very disappointed, and was about to say something when suddenly, a broadsword that was as bright as snow chopped off the prisoner’s cart’s iron chains with a bang. A few more chops and wood shavings swirled into the air, and the fences on one side of the prisoner’s cart were chopped down. With a few strokes, the manacles and wooden cangue on my and Xiao Huang’s bodies all broke off. Indeed, what a good blade!

Xiao Huang maneuvered his legs and feet, jumping off the cart. He extended his hand towards me. That black-clothed person, my dear friend, also very cordially asked me.

“Isn’t this little General An?”

I shook my head and then nodded. This form of address really hasn’t been used for a long time.

They were both puzzled. I grinned and urged them.

“You’re right. I’m An Yi.  But I won’t go with you. You should quickly flee. Please take care of yourselves!”

That black-clothed person became distracted.

“Isn’t the army seal in little General An‘s hands?”

But he was suddenly pulled out by Xiao Huang. At this moment, the soldiers who guarded the prisoner’s cart snuck in an attack. Xiao Huang and I were finally separated far apart by these soldiers.

I steadily watched that foolish child, who I raised with my own hands for three years, spur his horse and disappear with the black-clothed person, not even once turning his head back. This feeling was hard to describe. I understood somewhat, a bit of how parents marrying off their daughters must feel. Not happy, but instead sad. Except for parents marrying off their daughters, it must feel like ripping bones and gouging flesh. I’m just temporarily depressed, that’s all.

Because I lacked restraints while lying down in the prisoner’s cart, my sleep was very smooth and sweet. In a haze, I heard Yan Ping‘s gentle voice commanding the soldiers to clean up the battlefield and to give the black-clothed people who had not yet breathed their last a helping stab.  All this I just treated as a lullaby and fell deeply into sleep.

Sleeping soundly, I was pushed bit by bit. Probably out of habit, I thoughtlessly spoke.

“Xiao Huang, if you’re hungry, go grab a maize pancake from the pot to eat. Let me sleep more. I'm so tired.”

“That fool has already left.”

My eyes opened immediately, and in front of me were Yan Ping’s eyes, gentle to the point of being unbelievable. I’m not an ignorant young lady, however, and I know that this person, whether towards an enemy or a benefactor, would use this kind of face. So for a long time now, I haven’t had any delusions, and my heart has remained constant in my chest cavity.

I roughly rubbed my hair. With that black-clothed person’s assistance, I didn’t have a wooden cangue, manacles, or leg irons. Truly so comfortable.

“This can be blamed on habit.”

He quietly watched me. After a long while, he finally spoke.

“An Yi, aren’t you angry at all?”

“Angry for what?”

He said, with a resentful expression that showed I had failed to meet his expectations.

“That Qin Hui lived in seclusion next to you for three years, all for an army seal. But you lived like an animal to raise him. Don’t you feel unbearably fortunate?”

If he hadn’t reminded me, I would have almost forgotten. Great Qi‘s child emperor, his majesty, is named Qin Hui.

I gave a “che” of laughter, lazily turning my body over.

“A child emperor of brocade garments and jade meals like him had to suffer next to me, hungry for three years, eating husks and swallowing vegetables, and in the end, still didn’t find the army seal. I think that the fortunate person should be him, right?”

After a while of thinking.

“That year, when I was saving that fool, I didn’t once think of being repaid by him. Now, it’s merely finding out that that fool was never actually foolish, so there’s a bit of sorrow, but that’s it. Why live in aggravation?”

His complexion at once became unsightly. He gave a cold humph and turned his head to leave.

He wasn’t this kind of person before.

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